How to become an optimist in life: 10 psychological tips

There is hardly a person who does not periodically experience problems in his life. Family troubles, quarrels with loved ones, heaps at work, lack of money are common causes of pessimism and whining on the part of people. But as soon as everything gets better, the person becomes unrecognizable: a radiant smile, laughter and fun accompany him everywhere. Hence the question, can a person overcome life’s difficulties without a pessimistic attitude? How to program yourself to think positively? Today we will tell you how to become an optimist and here are the top ten best tips from psychologists around the world.

Who is an optimist?

An optimist is a person who expects a positive outcome of events. He believes that everything will be fine, success will definitely come. If we draw parallels with temperament types, then the optimist is closest to the sanguine person. Thanks to his confidence in luck, he is also distinguished by high spirits and good spirits. This characteristic helps to understand what the word optimist means.

Take the test: optimist or pessimist

The antagonist of this personality type is called a pessimist. If you put them in the same company, the contrast immediately becomes obvious. Positive will collide with negative, plus with minus. An optimist and a pessimist reflect the classical dualism of the world. They are like “Yin and Yang”, which complement each other, bringing special colors and shades to the dialogue. The most striking and common example showing the differences between these two types of thinking is a glass half filled with water. A pessimist will say that the glass is half empty, and an optimist will say that it is half full.

Only a realist can balance their dispute. And here we can recall another example. A pessimist sees a long tunnel. An optimist sees light at the end of this tunnel. And only a realist understands that the light comes from the train that is rushing towards them. This humorous story demonstrates the limitations of each of the opposing types of thinking. But, nevertheless, a deliberately positive approach has advantages, which will be discussed a little later.

Having figured out who optimists are, it’s good to find out what types there are, and how they differ from each other.

Types of optimists

Despite the fact that optimism is a rather average concept, its different types can be distinguished. First of all, optimists differ in their rational view of the world. Thus, optimism can be rational or irrational. In the first case, it arises in response to an adequate assessment of the situation, when a person understands that he has a real chance of winning. In the second case, we are talking about a blind, unfounded belief in success. Such an optimist is convinced of a positive outcome under any circumstances and even regardless of the efforts he makes. If a rational approach can be considered constructive, then irrationality is akin to arrogance and carelessness, which are fraught with disappointment.

There are also more original classifications. For example, American researcher Lionel Tiger proposed dividing optimism into small and large. The first concerns everyday situations and specific life moments. The second is associated with confidence in the positive resolution of global problems.

Polish scientist Janusz Czapinski distinguished between defensive and expansive optimism. They differ in the vector of movement: either avoiding failure (defense) or moving towards success (expansion). Let us immediately note that an optimist with the second type of thinking is in a more advantageous position, since he initially does not have a negative attitude. He does not think about failure, but simply strives for success. It is believed that expansive optimism is more characteristic of young people, while after 45 years its defensive form becomes widespread.

Individual and social optimism can also be distinguished. This quality is considered in the context of one person or a group of people, including society as a whole. This division was proposed by domestic sociologists.

At the everyday level, optimists are more difficult to classify, but realistically. This classification does not describe all possible options, since each case is individual, but we can say that there are the following types of optimists:

Dreamers - believe in a bright future, enjoying the very process of dreaming;
Naive people always wear rose-colored glasses, flatly refusing to accept reality;
Pretentious - characterized by youthful maximalism and complete rejection of problems;
Progressive - strive for high achievements in the future, putting every effort into their improvement;
Ethical - overflowing with faith in the victory of good over evil and a universal “Happy End”.

Perhaps in one of these descriptions someone will recognize themselves, or their neighbor, friend, or work colleague. The following are the main criteria that help us understand that we are an optimist.

Take a temperament test

Is it possible to become an optimist?

Many people, trying to become happy, set themselves various goals, believing that after achieving them they will certainly find peace of mind and a positive attitude, they dream of buying a new car or a cherished marriage, thinking that this will fill them with happiness.

However, as practice shows, when a certain goal is achieved, troubles continue, and a person moves further and further away from his dream. Why is this happening? Because optimistic people prefer to live today and now and perceive the world as beautiful from the very beginning, and not after achieving cherished goals or acquiring expensive things. After all, buying a car or making repairs are not put on the same plane as a feeling of satisfaction from life.

For people looking for an answer to the question of how to be an optimist in life, there are several recommendations:

there is no need to complain about life - any manifestation of self-pity, bad or disparaging thoughts is another message to the subconscious, it will not allow you to rise to a higher level;
change your attitude to the situation - whether a successful event occurred or an unsuccessful one is up to the individual to decide, it does not depend on external circumstances, bad luck is the lot of pessimists;
communicate with positive people - if there are few of them in your social circle, look for energetic individuals with whom you can simply joke, recharge your energy from them and share your own;
smile sincerely - psychologists have long noticed that the external manifestation of a positive attitude affects its stimulation from the inside;
train regularly - only moving forward towards your goal, without retreats and excuses, will be the right way to achieve a positive attitude.

Reading specialized literature, as well as delving into the meaning of optimistic quotes, will help you acquire a positive attitude towards life and confidence in a favorable outcome of any situation, here are some of them:

A month is certainly a long time, but the phrase “in a month” sounds more comforting than “never.”
Pretend that everything in your life is in complete order, this is the most effective way. If you can deceive yourself, then you can handle everything else.
If you're flying into an abyss after falling off a cliff, why not try to fly up? You won't lose anything from this.
There is an important secret in life - you need to go where you want, and not where they say you should.
If there is no way out of the situation, you need to create it yourself, using available materials.

Perhaps these tips will be useful to those who are tired of living in anticipation of happiness and success and are ready to radically change their attitude towards what is happening in order to gain spiritual harmony.

Such individuals also need help, but unlike everyone else. He will be sincerely grateful for this help, and if he does not receive it, he will begin to look for a way out on his own, without holding a grudge against the offenders.

Author of the article: Ermakova Marina Leonidovna, practical psychologist, specialist in developmental psychology

Pessimism has its positive sides

Who is a pessimist, according to the majority? A loser who, due to his bad character and eternal discontent, has no friends.

This is true only for the most persistent, most “ideological” pessimists, a textbook example of which can be considered a mechanic named Philidor Zeleny from Kir Bulychev’s stories about Alisa Selezneva. His immortal phrases: “This will not end well!” and “But I warned you!” can be called a reflection of the most negative side of the pessimistic view.

However, there are also conditionally “moderate” pessimists, which means that there are people who see not the whole world in black, but only its individual parts. The definition of the term itself suggests that a pessimist is someone who constantly expects meanness and misfortune from the world. And this is where his strength lies.

A true pessimist always remembers: no matter how much you hope for a successful outcome of events, the probability of an unsuccessful outcome is much higher, and in order to minimize the damage, you should, while hoping for the best, always prepare for the worst. Therefore, a pessimist who strives for self-improvement does not have to try to change his outlook on life - sometimes it is enough to develop his strengths (foreseeing troubles and preparing for them) and learn to cope with negative ones.

Stop making mountains out of molehills

Stop turning small problems into disasters. This is a bad habit if you don't want to feel fear and stress about your current situation and want to take decisive action to change it.

An easy way to prevent this is to put your life into perspective. Ask yourself, will this matter in 5 years? Or will you forget about it in a few days?

How to become a pessimist?

Surprisingly, many people, without noticing it themselves, become pessimists. It is quite difficult to meet a person who would become a negative critic of his own free will and decide to cause significant harm to his health. Basically, all people become like this unconsciously. What is this connected with? First of all, with moral or physical fatigue. A modern person is forced to combine education with earning money, and he must also work several jobs in order to be able to provide for himself and his family. Due to persistent fatigue, he constantly experiences a feeling of depression and apathy towards everything.

Another reason why people become pessimists is lack of self-confidence. Because of this, people often do not do what they would like to do and, as a rule, never achieve success in life. So they become pessimists from birth. Often they even need the help of a psychotherapist in order to cope with their own insecurities and radically change their lives.

Look for something good in any negative situation

Learn to correctly perceive failures and obstacles that appear in your life. When you find yourself in unpleasant situations, how do you behave? Do you feel like giving up and hiding from the world around you? Is your mind filled with pessimistic thoughts?

Change your reaction to situations that seem negative. Ask yourself a few questions that will give you strength:

How would my best friend support me in this situation?
What good can be taken from what happened?
What can I learn?
What should I do differently next time to improve the result?

How to communicate with an optimist

Optimists do not like it when they are surrounded by pessimistic people.
From one point of view, a relationship with a person who is overwhelmed with optimism allows you to improve your mood, and sometimes your self-esteem. However, at times this leads to the development of excessive self-confidence, which is not always healthy.

You can consider a situation where they want to expel a student from the university, and his fellow optimist calms and encourages him. On the one hand, with such actions he relieves excess nervous tension, and on the other hand, he convinces that everything will be fine. However, if you do nothing, the deduction situation will not change. The exception is if this friend himself goes to the dean’s office and really helps his friend stay. But if he simply throws words to the wind, it does not lead to anything good. In such a situation, the student will be expelled.

If there is an optimist among your friends, first of all, you need to make sure that his actions are appropriate, that they correspond to his knowledge and capabilities, and correspond to reality. If you notice that the words of an optimist do not coincide with the actions, do not rely on such a person, be careful. When communicating with an optimist, keep in mind that such an individual may be irritated by despondency and self-doubt. If you are going to enter into a dialogue with him, avoid talking about fatalism and negativity, and do not behave like a pessimist. Remember that optimists are convinced of their worth, their strength and that fate is favorable to them

They expect a similar attitude from others, that is, it is important for them that the interlocutor’s worldview coincides with theirs. If you have different views on life, do not be surprised if the optimist does not communicate with you.

Now you know the definition of such a thing as an optimist. As you can see, people who have a positive outlook on life may also have problems, but they know how to deal with them. It is comfortable to be around an optimistic person, you want to imitate him, communication with such a person is not burdensome. Such individuals know how to rejoice, relax and have fun; it is not boring to spend time with them. Appreciate communication with such people.

Why fill your life with optimism?

Optimists are less likely to experience colds. And all thanks to a positive attitude. They don’t think about the fact that if they find themselves in the rain, they will get sick or catch a cold; they are convinced that everything will be fine.
Optimism increases life expectancy. It has been scientifically proven that people who spend less of their strength and energy on negative emotions and experiences look much better.
Optimists are more successful. While others see obstacles and problems in their path, optimists see these difficulties as an opportunity, a chance to win. They are not afraid of difficulties; they are convinced that they can cope with everything. When faced with an obstacle, they treat it as a challenge and take on the task with interest.
Large social circle. Optimists are sociable. Moreover, they are surrounded only by good people, because these are the people they attract.
Optimists are always in a good mood. When faced with difficulties, they may also become upset, even cry, but only for a while. Optimists switch to a positive attitude faster than other people and continue to live, enjoying their lives.

By becoming an optimist you:

self-esteem will increase, you will become more confident,
your relationships with others will improve,
you will learn to cope more easily with difficult moments in your life,
understand how to get out of any difficult situation,
You will be able to engage in self-development, realize yourself in any business, optimism will provide you with personal growth.

You need to be an optimist, because a lack of optimism can lead to the following consequences:

decline in quality of life,
deterioration of relationships with loved ones,
loss of physical strength, regular fatigue,
development of psychosomatic illnesses,
state of constant stress,
deterioration of appearance, premature aging.

Bring positivity into someone else's life

Sometimes, to get rid of a pessimistic mood, it is worth trying to do something positive for someone else. Do this and see the person's reaction, you will feel good knowing that you made someone's day better. Here are some ways:

Show kindness. Give a sincere compliment, hold the door, let someone pass on the road.
Help. Give helpful advice to someone who finds themselves in a situation you are familiar with. Or simply help your loved one with cooking and cleaning the house.
Listen. Everyone needs to speak up sometimes. Be the person your loved one can tell about anything.

Start your morning with what you like

Your first actions in the morning often set the tone for your entire day. If your morning boils down to waking up at the last moment, getting dressed in a hurry, licking toothpaste, biting a sandwich and running out into the cold to meet an “exciting” school/work day, don’t expect anything good from your mood.

Solution: get up half an hour to an hour earlier (it’s not easy to be happy, yes) and do what you really love to do - read a book, play a computer game, watch a TV series or chat with your girlfriend/boyfriend (she/he will need to be warned morally as well). prepare for such an early pleasure. Otherwise, you can start your day on that shrill note).

How to communicate with an optimist

A person who is used to being despondent sometimes does not understand: who is this optimist? He thinks somehow strangely, unrealistically. At least that's what he thinks. Sometimes it is quite difficult for a pessimist to communicate with a person who has a positive mindset, because the difference in their worldview is too great. A pessimist is more conflicted, so he can spoil the nerves of an optimist. Therefore, the recommendation is this: you need to learn from him. Any person with a positive mindset has a valuable behavior pattern that helps him overcome any difficulties in life.

Optimist man

It is useful to communicate with optimists in order to receive support from them

It is important not to parasitize here. It's better to become one yourself

As a short-term measure, seeking reassurance from an optimist can also be helpful.

Optimists are more flexible and solve problems situationally, while pessimists tend to constantly play it safe and perform hundreds of rituals to feel normal. This can also complicate their relationship.

To learn how to communicate correctly with an optimist, you need to understand how he thinks

To do this, it is important to communicate more with such a rare, but this makes it even more valuable category of people

Who are optimists

An optimist is an individual who believes in a positive outcome of events, he tries to approach life more simply, and is not distracted by unimportant things, especially those that carry negativity. The word "optimist" comes from the Latin "optimus", which means the best.

There is an opinion that people filled with optimism are healthier physically, they also have stronger immunity and there are no psychosomatic diseases

Such individuals quickly establish friendships; it is important for them to remain socially active. An optimist believes that you can find a solution to any problem, if you stay in a positive mood, everything will definitely work out

Sometimes it seems to people that optimists live with rose-colored glasses, have their head in the clouds, invent a fairy tale for themselves and live in it. In fact, such individuals also face difficulties, but they look at them differently: any failure is perceived as a life lesson from which valuable experience can be learned.

Method No. 7. Enjoy life

If you don't have specific goals, such thoughts deprive you of optimism. Decide clearly what you want to achieve. If you don’t have a mature plan yet, it’s worth doing small things.
Find yourself in hobbies, find a hobby. In such a situation, negative thoughts fade into the background. Over time, you will be able to overcome self-doubt and pessimism.
Get into the habit of scheduling your day. Follow personal instructions, this way you can avoid stressful situations. If possible, find a job you like, or take advantage of your current job and love it.
Also know how to rest and relax properly, and deny yourself less of anything. There is no need to set limits. Spontaneously get together on vacation with friends, go abroad if you have not been there before.
There is no need to look for excuses that you cannot afford such actions. You can mentally relax in nature with friends. Go alone to the ice cream zoo and have a lot of fun.
Or choose a package for a week. Nowadays it is not difficult to go abroad. Buy a last-minute tour, you can easily keep it to 15 thousand rubles per person. If something happens, don’t be afraid of loneliness.

how to become a positive and cheerful person

RULE No. 7. Give it to yourself!

Words of approval, signs of attention, gifts and surprises are what improve your mood. And sometimes there are periods in life when such things are sorely lacking. However, for a true optimist this is not such a problem.

What prevents a person from pleasing himself and fulfilling some of his cherished desires? For example, at the end of a hard working day, treat yourself to a cup of freshly brewed coffee in a cozy cafe? Or buy something that you have dreamed of for so long, timing your desired purchase, for example, to coincide with the completion of an important and responsible project? There is a considerable amount of truth in the catchphrase that we are treated the same way we treat ourselves. Therefore, you should not complain that no one loves you and is in no hurry to do something good for you.

It's better to think about how you can take care of yourself and lift your mood. Everything is in our hands, and it’s just wonderful!

Realize: not everything in this life is against you

The world around you is not your friend, but it is not your enemy either. This is a giant dispassionate caravan, which, you know, goes on its own - bark at it, praise it, shed tears or admire it. It can gift you or crush you, bend you or, on the contrary, bend under you (if you are very lucky or try very hard) - the world is equally ready to accept both your failures and your successes.

Stop thinking that everything that exists is against you. This makes everything much easier.

Meaning of the word

In the literal sense of the word, an optimist is the best; the concept itself comes from the Latin “optimus”, that is, a positively minded person who is convinced that to solve any problem there will always be a better solution that will resolve any situation with a positive result.

Who is an optimist? This is the name of a person who, during life’s difficulties, prefers not to give in to despondency; he does not allow himself to “give up,” but is always looking for new ways and solutions. He is practically never in a state of depression, depression and melancholy, and does not have the habit of feeling sorry for himself and causing this feeling in those around him. True optimists do not consider failures, which certainly occur on the path of every person, as a fatal coincidence of circumstances and do not tie these events to the structure of their personality. They believe that all troubles are temporary, and perceive positive events as natural.

What is an optimist from a philosophical point of view? In ancient times, entire schools were created in the direction of philosophical optimism, which gathered supporters of the theory that said “the world around us is ideal and the best of all possible, and all the events that take place in it are aimed at the benefit of those living in this world.” Now there are no such movements, but true optimists exist among ordinary people, and there are not so few of them. They are intuitively convinced that any situation, even the most terrible one, can always be resolved; you just need to stop panicking and focus all your thoughts and actions on a positive outcome.

Be grateful for the things you usually take for granted

If you look at your daily life through a negative lens, you're probably missing out on a lot of things to be grateful for. You have something that many people in this world don't have.

Take a few minutes to do these simple things:

you get out of bed in the morning and go to bed in the evening;
you are not starving;
you have a roof over your head;
you drink as much pure water as you want;
you have family and friends who can support you.

How to become an optimist

To become an optimist, you need to follow these recommendations:

Be calm with your emotions. If negativity appears, you just need to let it be. There is no need to get involved in sad emotions or try to do something about them. Any emotions are short-term. If you don't unwind them, they will go away on their own. An optimist knows how to live in harmony with any of his emotions, even those that are considered negative. Meditate. Meditation allows you to train the skill of accepting your emotional state. This is an effective self-observation technique. Decide on goals. You need to understand what a person generally wants in life, build a plan on how to achieve it. After this, you need to take and take the first step. It will be easier later. When the first successes begin, emotions will automatically become positive. Ask a question how to use an unpleasant situation. In psychology, this approach is called surplus. Instead of sitting and sadly thinking about what a person has lost from a crisis situation, it is much wiser to determine what he has gained. Act despite negative emotions and doubts. Probably the most important tip. As they say, appetite comes with eating. It's the same with inspiration. It comes only when a person begins to do something. Relying on previous successes plays an important role in the formation of optimism.

Therefore, it is necessary to pay special attention to even small successes.

If you follow these simple recommendations, becoming an optimist will not be difficult. In short, being a positive person is beneficial on all fronts. An optimist and an optimist are people who can truly be called happy.

How to become an optimist

First of all, you need to understand that you really want to change and bring more optimism into your life.

Next, you need to get rid of the habits typical of pessimists. To do this you need:

don't feel sorry for yourself
do not label others,
do not rush to complicate the current situation,
easier to deal with losses
rid yourself of guilt,
deal with problems as they arise,
be sure that everything that happens is for the better,
stop being wary of future failures, criticizing yourself, how much in vain,
do not watch tragic films, news, more positive information,
rely only on yourself
adequately assess your abilities.

Learn to use certain exercises.

You can purchase a special rubber band that will help you get rid of bad thoughts. When something negative appears in your head, you need to tighten the elastic band put on your hand and let it go. Over time, the relationship “negative”, “pain in the arm” will form in your subconscious. If you can't do exercises with an elastic band, just pinch yourself.
We fight beliefs that limit us. Surely, you have more than once caught yourself thinking that you are “constantly unlucky” or “no one appreciates you.” Such thoughts are transmitted by your subconscious to the outside world, then they materialize. Change, stop thinking like that, start convincing yourself that everything is still ahead and will definitely work out.
Every time you encounter a difficult situation, analyze it and identify something valuable for yourself, some positive aspects.
You need to identify for yourself people who are able to give moments of happiness, being next to whom makes you smile. You also need to decide on the places where you feel happy. When negativity visits or you simply give up, call such a person, think about such a place, imagine that you are there now. This will allow you to change your negative attitude to a positive one.
Imagine your future and what you expect from it. Take magazines, cut out pictures of your future life from them, make a collage. The finished poster can be hung on the wall. Now your task, inspired by these illustrations, is to strive for your dream.

Focus on the present moment and stay in it

Negative thoughts usually arise when you think about the past or future. You are either worried about what will happen, or you are reliving some event from the past over and over again.

Return to the present. Focus on what is happening to you at the moment, then you will have fewer negative thoughts. And you will be better able to cope with the tasks you are performing now.

Here are a couple ways to do this:

Take a few minutes to focus on what is happening around you. What you see, feel, hear. Who and what is near you?
Take a few minutes to focus on your breathing. Focus solely on the air you inhale and exhale.