Clinical picture
Social phobia is a pathological fear of social contacts and activities accompanied by the attention of strangers. This is a serious neurotic disorder that is chronic in nature and usually occurs without remission.
Social phobia, as a rule, begins to develop in childhood and adolescence. Up to 90 percent of social phobias develop the disease before the age of 25. Such an early onset of social disorder and lack of treatment often causes disturbances in normal personality development. Social phobes have difficulty obtaining an education and are unable to fully demonstrate their professional qualities, which contributes to the development of disability, a low level of material security and dependence on relatives. Social phobia negatively affects the ability to form close relationships and leads to loneliness.
Symptoms of social phobia
Most of the unpleasant consequences can be avoided with timely diagnosis of social disorder. The main defining feature of social phobia is a person’s obsessive fear that others will evaluate his personality negatively in a number of social situations. Fear of negative evaluation and judgment makes a social phobia person constantly feel embarrassed and ashamed when interacting with others.
Read more about what social phobia is and how to deal with it:
Generalized social anxiety disorder involves fear in the vast majority of social situations. In the non-generalized form of social phobia, fear occurs only during certain types of social activity, for example:
- phone conversation;
- defending your opinion in a dispute;
- refusing a friend's request:
- speaking in front of an audience;
- demonstration of your attitude towards another person - both negative and positive;
- trying to get acquainted;
- returning goods to the store;
- participation in a party;
- one-on-one communication with a stranger;
- performing some action while being the object of attention, for example, entering a room where other people are already present;
- examination of knowledge and abilities;
- maintaining direct eye contact with the interlocutor.
The condition is aggravated by the fact that the emotion of fear provokes the occurrence of various vegetative symptoms that can be noticeable to others - redness of the skin, increased sweating, stiffness of body movements, trembling in the body and voice. This confuses the social phobia even more. He may be terrified of vomiting in front of onlookers, or of being embarrassed in some other way.
Moreover, if the experienced social fear and its physical manifestations do not force one to avoid frightening situations, then the diagnosis of social phobia is not made. In such cases, only ordinary shyness and social anxiety are assumed.
With true social phobia, a person in every possible way avoids social interactions and situations in which he risks being the center of attention. In severe forms of social phobia, such behavior leads to complete social isolation and the emergence of suicidal thoughts.
Causes of phobia
Various assumptions have been made about the factors causing the development of social phobia. One of the key factors is the presence of traumatic social experiences. Social phobia occurs when experiencing or witnessing a perceived public failure or humiliation. An impressive number of social phobics have personally experienced physical abuse and humiliation at school from peers or bullying at work.
One theory suggests that the child copies the social phobic behavior of the parents. On an intuitive level, he senses the anxiety of his mother or father, and absorbs negative attitudes towards the world.
It is also noted that many people suffering from social phobia were deprived of the necessary warmth and psychological support from significant adults in childhood. Indeed, in early childhood, it is the parents who are the child’s model of the entire outside world. It is obvious that disharmonious communications with loved ones are a traumatic experience for the psyche.
Another explanation for social phobia is a lack of social skills. If a person does not know and does not understand how to behave in a particular situation, this may cause him to fear making a mistake. Overprotective adults often limit a child's chances of gaining the necessary experience of social interaction.
Psychoanalysts explain the fear of being rejected or rudely ridiculed by the projection of one’s own aggressiveness onto others. Indeed, from the point of view of psychoanalysis, the function of anxiety is to protect against awareness of unacceptable instinctual impulses. Social phobia may hide narcissistic tendencies and selfish desires that a person expects to satisfy at the expense of others.
For example, a guy experiences symptoms of social anxiety when meeting girls. Hypertrophied pride may be behind the fear of rude refusal. Or, for example, a not fully realized consumer attitude towards girls and self-condemnation in this regard causes him to expect fair punishment.
Causes of social phobia
Experts (psychologists, psychotherapists, psychiatrists) call the two main causes of social phobia a genetic factor (social phobia can be inherited) and a factor of improper upbringing .
Sometimes it is very difficult to independently understand, for example, serious childhood psychotrauma or to understand that parents, who were role models and ideals, became the cause of a problem called social phobia. But you have to try to do it!
To independently get to the bottom of the causes of social phobia, you need to analyze your childhood and remember :
- Did your parents themselves suffer from social anxiety?
- Weren't they too caring, nurturing and protective?
- Were they too strict, critical, demanding to be perfect?
The root of social phobia is the fear of negative evaluation from others and the expectation , the attitude of receiving just such an evaluation. A child, whom his parents often condemned with just one stern look, may grow up and begin to unjustifiably think about everyone: “These people look at me condemningly! Yes, they clearly don’t like me...”
The problem of social phobia may be hidden not in too strict or otherwise protective upbringing, and not in the genetic factor of inheritance, but in some one, but very strong psychotraumatic situation that occurred in the past.
It’s worth thinking and remembering, wasn’t there some kind of situation in childhood when you wanted to fall into the ground in public, when something went wrong and everyone around you started laughing, and then they made fun of you for a long time, humiliating and insulting you?
Sometimes social phobia is developed as a result of mobbing, prolonged psychological bullying (read more about mobbing in the articles “Mobbing at work” and “Mobbing at school”), and even as a result of prolonged observation from the outside, associated with sympathy for the victim of mobbing.
You can begin to fear society and communication if you happen to observe a single case of a traumatic situation in public in the life of another, even a stranger.
Treatment of social phobia
Early diagnosis, taking pharmacological medications and psychotherapy in the initial stages of social phobia helps prevent the development of inadequate adaptation mechanisms, such as avoidant behavior or drug addiction.
How to cure social phobia with pills
Despite the fact that the onset of social phobia precedes the development of any comborid disease, drug therapy is more often prescribed specifically for the treatment of a secondary disease. If social phobia is accompanied by depression, reversible MAO inhibitors (Moclobemide, Tetrindole) are prescribed. For panic attacks, beta blockers (propranolol or atenolol) are prescribed.
It is important to understand that social phobia is a serious disorder that has a protracted, progressive nature and therefore requires a long course of treatment. Even after stopping the drugs after six months of therapy, the risk of relapse reaches 50%. And yet life without social phobia is possible. The chances of achieving sustained remission increase with a combination of drug and psychological therapy.
How to overcome social phobia with psychotherapy
The following are considered the most effective methods of working with social networks:
- modeling (observation of the experience of someone else and its imitation);
- cognitive hypnotherapy;
- systematic desensitization;
- psychodrama.
An important element of therapy are relaxation exercises (breathing exercises, neuromuscular relaxation). They help reduce physical stress and make it easier to work with other techniques.
Since one of the main goals of therapy is to manage anxiety during social interactions, group forms of treatment will be helpful. Typically, these types of therapy are conducted in the form of training to develop self-confidence and gain communication skills.
Combating social phobia with cognitive hypnotherapy
The use of hypnosis more than doubles the effectiveness of standard psychotherapy and significantly speeds up the recovery process. The goal of cognitive psychotherapy is to replace negative mental attitudes in the client’s subconscious that produce social fears. To find out more about how to get rid of social phobia using hypnosis, we recommend contacting psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valeryevich Baturin.
4. Stop being your partner’s “social assistant”
“Be clear about your position: you are ready to support your partner in every possible way, but you will no longer take on his social obligations,” advises Larry Kappel.
Who can I turn to for help? Psychotherapists work directly with social phobia. You can also see a couples therapist who can help you work through your relationship problems. In the most severe cases, consultation with a psychiatrist and medication may be necessary.
If your loved one has social anxiety, you don't have to suffer in silence. Recognize what is happening and help him change.
Social phobia: how to get rid of it yourself
Since the course of psychotherapy takes quite a long time, the treatment takes a significant toll on the pocket of a social phobia person, who, due to his illness, cannot always support himself financially. Advice from psychologists will come to your aid on how to overcome social phobia on your own.
Social phobia: how to get rid of it by correcting beliefs
The feeling of social anxiety is caused not by events themselves, but by their assessment. Thoughts arise first, and only then does an emotional reaction occur. It is important to learn to monitor the automatic negative thoughts that provoke social fear.
From the point of view of cognitive psychologists, the source of fear is the erroneous worldview of a social phobe. A person does not perceive the world objectively, as it really is. He interprets events from the point of view of cognitive constructs (“smart-stupid”, “good-bad”, “friendly-hostile”). Every day, a social phobe has a choice of which pole to use to predict social events. But, as a rule, he makes a selection, choosing an interpretation that confirms his negative picture of the world.
To get rid of social fears, it is important to be able to accept an alternative point of view. For example, instead of the usual thought “she thinks I’m stupid,” you can consider facts that speak in favor of the opposite:
- “If she thought I was stupid, wouldn’t she avoid me?”;
- “I have friends who find me an interesting conversationalist”;
- “everyone sometimes says stupid things, but nevertheless this does not push people away from them.”
Social phobia: self-treatment by changing self-image
People suffering from social phobia often develop a negative self-concept - a stable system of ideas about their personality. The building blocks that build the self-image can be a person’s abilities, values, body, and his experience of communicating with significant others.
Self-esteem built on external factors - the attitude of others, exam results, physical appearance - will always be accompanied by severe anxiety. Stronger self-esteem is based on a person's spiritual values and strategic life goals.
It is important to correctly select people into your reference group - individuals who serve as a kind of standard and source of value orientations. Surround yourself with people who love themselves and treat others with respect. Communication with people who are always dissatisfied and criticize everyone and everything will reduce your self-concept to a minus.
How to get rid of social phobia and shyness using self-hypnosis:
How to Treat Social Phobia on Your Own by Improving Your Communication Skills
Social phobes lack practical experience in how to start a conversation, express their needs, perceive the needs of others, give a presentation, etc. As a result, one of the main ways to cope with social phobia comes down to social skills training.
Standard small talk doesn't involve deep emotional interaction and doesn't have to be exciting. To establish contact, it is enough to memorize standard phrases and choose everyday topics for discussion (weather, mutual acquaintances, a recent event in the world of sports or cinema). Study specialized literature on the science of communication.
How to deal with social phobia using psychodrama
Imagine you are playing the role of someone—a successful politician when you need to convince someone, or an eminent scientist when giving a presentation. Acting out a role will quietly improve your posture, gestures and voice, change your perception of the situation, help you get rid of excessive dependence on the results of the conversation, and find better arguments in a dispute.
How to overcome social phobia through self-hypnosis
Using your imagination can be very helpful. Imagine your fear in the form of an animal or plant, describe its character and characteristics, try to make friends with it, tame it.
How to get rid of social phobia yourself using self-hypnosis:
How to deal with social phobia yourself using the desensitization method
People suffering from social phobias prefer to never leave their comfort zone. It is important to break the vicious circle. Small daily steps towards change are enough to get rid of even strong fear.
How to overcome social phobia yourself through small changes:
- write down on separate cards the social situations that frighten you;
- choose one of the actions that least frightens you;
- break the action into separate steps and perform it step by step due to your ability to control your anxiety.
For example, you feel embarrassed while having lunch in a cafe in front of strangers. Start by ordering and drinking just a cup of tea in public. When this ritual becomes familiar to you, try ordering dessert. Once you feel that you have managed your anxiety and can enjoy eating in public, move on to the next item on your list of fears.
Getting rid of social anxiety in teenagers
During adolescence, young people are at increased risk of developing social phobia because:
- some physical changes are perceived negatively by the teenager himself and his environment;
- increased vulnerability and youthful maximalism do not allow us to adequately evaluate ourselves and others.
Social phobia in teenagers
Experts believe that the earlier the disorder is diagnosed, the easier it is to understand how to overcome social phobia with the help of medicinal and psychotherapeutic methods.
Like any illness, social phobia is better prevented than cured. Therefore, even before adolescence, parents teach their child:
- Calm breathing skills that will help a young person remain calm in difficult situations.
- Ability to overcome crisis situations.
- Rules of behavior in difficult circumstances.
- The ability to overcome your fears and achieve your goals.
If preventive measures do not help, then modern psychotherapists know how to treat social phobia: the main methods are cognitive behavioral therapy or group psychotherapy.
